I had no idea our journey to start a family would include...
Disappointment and heartbreak. After years of trying to get pregnant and then finally experiencing a successful fertility treatment, I found myself being rushed for emergency surgery. All my hopes and dreams crashed due to an ectopic pregnancy. I was isolated and, though physically on the mend, I was still emotionally broken. At this point I was divinely connected to a community of women through a small group called A Blessed Womb. The teachings had a different approach. It was not just about filling my womb with a baby, but instead the lessons guided me on how to shine the light of Christ into my brokenness. I surrendered my plans and I began to seek the Lord with my whole heart. When I embraced my brokenness, I experienced His blessings through the work He was doing in my life.
When I started my journey of obedience and serving others for His glory, God began to reveal His plans for me. The Lord led me far beyond my comfort zone where I had to be fully dependent on Him. You see, it is easy to love God on the mountain tops, but we grow with God in the valley. In that valley, my heart still ached for the baby I never got to hold, but God was developing me spiritually to see all I really needed was Him.
Through this season of struggle and waiting, I am just as grateful to have carried my heavenly baby as I am for my precious miracle baby, Jack, who I get to kiss everyday. Thank you, Lord, for giving purpose to my pain.